Bishop's Interview

This whole ordeal starts off two weeks ago. Joanna and I were at Linger Longer and Bro. Olsen came up and asked me about how my calling was going. I pretty much dismissed it. Then he told Joanna that they'd put her in a calling soon, and I told him that she could have mine.
Last Sunday Joanna and I were both called to meet with Bro. Olsen before church. I go in first, and he tells me that what I had said had got him thinking. He then released me from my calling, and did not give me a new one. I was ecstatic, to say the least. Then Joanna goes in. She comes back out and says, "I think I just got your calling". She had.
Yesterday I kept my phone near me, terrified that I'd get a call to go in and meet with the Bishop. But I didn't. Safe for another week. Not. After church Caleb approached me and asked me to meet with the bishop later that evening. I agreed. And so at 6:20 pm I made my way across the street to accept my new calling in the ward.
After waiting at least a half hour and chatting up some of the boys from my ward, the bishop called me in. I sat across from him prepared to hear my worst fear: that I was once again teaching Relief Society. But no, that did not come up. Following is a brief sketch of the 20 minute interview.
Bishop: So who called this meeting, me or you?
Me: Definitely you.
Bishop: Well, I wanted to meet with you today because I worry about you.
Me: What?
Bishop: Tell me about your experience with the Communications Committee.
Me: Well, at first I went around and signed people up for the ward website. And then I helped Matt out with the bulletin board the first week, and after that he never called to tell me he was redoing it, and I was fine with that.
Bishop: And so you didn't care enough to contact Matt about it?
Me: Nope.
Bishop (pulling out my new member sheet): What ward were you in before this one?
Me: I don't know.
Bishop: Well, it says that you came from the _ ward, but we got your records from the _ ward.
Me: Yeah, honestly, I don't even remember what wards I've been in or the bishop's names.
Bishop: That should tell you something.
Me: Well, I entered BYU last winter, so I was in one ward, and then for spring term I was in another, and then for summer I was in a third. It was all really fast and I was really busy, so I just don't remember.
Bishop: It says here that you've been a primary teacher, a primary pianist, a Relief Society teacher (a Relief Society teacher...), and part of the activity's committee. How was your experience with the Activity's Committee?
Me: Honestly, that shouldn't even be on there. I didn't do anything for it. They met during my staff meetings so I never helped plan anything or participated in anything.
(Bishop starts staring at me strangely).
Bishop: Do you even want a calling?
Me: I don't know.
Bishop: Because I really don't want to give you one if you don't want to fulfill it. I'm not here to make your life miserable. But if I don't, I don't want you complaining to me in three months that you don't feel apart of the ward. Last week we released you from the Communications Committee. How did that make you feel?
Me: It was a happy day.
Bishop: Jessica, tell me about yourself. I want to know what makes you tick.
Me: Well... I'm pretty awkward.
Bishop: Awkward?
Me: Yes. I'm always involved in awkward situations. I don't mean to be, but I am. Even if no one else feels awkward, I do.
Bishop: Do you like being awkward?
Me: I don't know.
Bishop (starting to smile): Jessica, I think you're delightful. Have you participated in any of the ward activities?
Me: Well, I was just over at Linger Longer before I ran over here for this meeting.
Bishop: Did you interact much?
Me: Well, no. I was only there for five minutes before I ran over.
Bishop: Anything else?
Me: Don't tell anyone this, but FHE is kind of like my guilty pleasure.
Bishop: Your guilty pleasure?
Me: Yes.
Bishop: Why is that?
Me: Well, we didn't have a family for the first three months...
Bishop: Why is that?
Me: I don't know.
Bishop: What apartment are you in?
Me: 17.
Bishop: Ah, yes, 17. Families fought over you.
Me: Yeah, after no one claimed us for 3 months.
Bishop: What is it that you like about FHE?
Me: I don't know. Last week we played the Thimble game, and that was fun, and then someone left and brought back a didgeridoo. That was pretty cool, too!
Bishop: Who else is in your apartment?
Me: Becky.
Bishop: Ah, yes, the rugby player.
Me: Yeah, the throw up girl. And Marie Beck. She's on the basketball team.
Bishop: The basketball team?
Me: Ah-huh. For BYU.
Bishop: And you've got Rebecca. She's wonderful.
Me: She is.
Bishop: Who else?
Me: Mandee.
Bishop: Ah, yes, I just met with her and Jordan earlier tonight.
Me: Yup, Jordan's pretty awesome.
Bishop: Is that all?
Me: Well, there's also Joanna. She's new. She sang in sacrament meeting a couple weeks back.
Bishop: That's right, Joanna Killgore. What a delightful apartment you have.
Me: Yup, I like them.
Bishop: It says here that your temple recommend is about to expire.
Me: Actually, I don't have one.
Bishop: What?
Me: Well, I had my purse stolen last November, and it was inside my wallett. And then I never got it replaced.
Bishop: If you had one would you use it?
Me: Yes.
Bishop: Because there are girls that want to go all the time, with their roommates and such.
Me: Well, there have been times that I've wanted to go, but I haven't had a recommend. Like when the ward did baptisms at the Salt Lake Temple. But I lost it the weekend before and your appointments were all booked up.
Bishop: Well, I'd give you one tonight but I'm already behind schedule. So you'll have to come back next week to get it when I give you your calling.
Me: Okay.
Bishop (starts to get up, then sits back down real fast): Jessica, do you want to get married?
Me: Well, eventually, someday, mmm... YES.
Bishop: Do you date much?
Me: No.
Bishop: Why not?
Me: Because I'm awkward.
Bishop: You'd be surprised...