Person 19: Mom

I could rant about my mother enough to take up more lines than my entire blog has done yet. Instead, I will simply say this:

1. My mother has always made me feel like I wasn't good enough in some way. For example, I am the one who calls her, she never calls me, and I get scolded for not talking to her enough. Also, when we do talk the entire conversation revolves around her. She is hardly interested in my life and when she finally takes a minute to ask me I have no desire to tell her because she doesn't actually seem to care.

2. She gave birth to me, and thus I am in existence.

3. She left my dad, which allowed the abuse cycle to end and allowed my dad and I to have a better relationship later on. Although she left him, he was replaced by Eric who was much worse.

4. My mother makes me question my self worth.

5. I feel like the adult in our relationship.

6. She doesn't seem to appreciate me. She complains that I don't come home, but I don't come home because I can't stand to be around her for very long, and she expects me to buy my own plane tickets, for a trip that I don't even want to take.

7. She only seems to think that I am of worth now because it turns out that I have a sense of humor.

8. Nothing in her life is good. She is happy about nothing. She only complains. I don't like to talk to her.

Pretty much, she gave birth to me. Then she raised me, which was a great sacrifice. She shielded me from my dad until she left him. And since then, I feel like I'm supposed to make up for it somehow and I'm just not doing a good enough job.