Person 15: Eric

I have never in my life hated anyone as much as I have hated Eric. He was the man that my mom started dating right after she left my dad. It was way too soon. And he was evil. He ordered us around. He told me that I was going to be a lesbian because I hated men so much. He told me that I would never amount to anything. He told me that I would never graduate from college. He threatened to have my younger brother hurt. He was so mad at him once that he almost hit him. I had my hand on the phone the whole time. He was mean. He was nasty. He was the most abusive man that I have ever known.

He was stupid and uneducated. One time we had an argument over the word "narcissistic". I told him that it meant to be into yourself, and he said something completely different. He yelled at me and told me I was stupid and didn't know anything. I even had the Greek mythology to back it up. I offered to look it up in the dictionary. That just got me yelled at even more. Or what about the times he would yell at my friends when they were over? Some of my friends weren't allowed to hang out with me anymore because he was around. Others were just hated by him and would cause even more contention in my home. What about the time I was getting something to eat and he told me that I was a fatty and should be eating salad instead? Really, he just hated me. And I returned that feeling...

And yet, every time my mom broke up with him she always went back to him. His acceptance for her was more important to her than her love for us. I'd literally have nightmares over this. Once I woke up and in my semilucid state I bit my arm thinking it was his. I left marks.

One time I was so sick and laying on the couch. My mom left me to go on a date with him. Then she called me on her way home to tell me that he was coming over and I needed to go upstairs to my room. It hurt to move. I cried the entire way up the stairs, and then in my room realizing that he was more important than I was.

I am less trusting of my mother now. I don't believe her or trust her when it comes to men. I'm more guarded. I distrust men from the moment I meet them because of him. I felt worthless because of him. I felt failed. I felt unimportant. I felt ugly. I don't like the guys my friends date, because I don't trust them. I don't think it'll work out. When it comes down to it, I am more guarded and hard hearted because of him. I am more hateful and spiteful. He made me feel powerless, which is probably why I'd attack him in my dreams. I hate no one as much as I hate his family.