I used to wear these shoes to church all the time in Oxnard. They're black, red and white. They went with everything. I bought them at the $7 shoe store. Ashley loved them so much that she bought her own pair planning to wear them to Aaron's brother's wedding.
But these stick out in my mind for another reason: my first Sunday at BYU.
I didn't know what to expect. I had braved going out of my room long enough to meet this girl named Jessie who took me to get my ID card, let me borrow her Ethernet cable, took me to the Cannon so I would stop living off of trail mix, and told me when church was. I actually kept a diary for the whole first week I was at BYU. Here's my 19-year-old experience:
January 4, 2008
6 pm
So I wandered down the hall to go get my ID earlier, and I ran into this girl Jessica that I met on the stairs yesterday. She was with another girl named Sarah, who was leaving. I inquired as to where I could get my ID, and she offered to take me. So Jessica Wilkinson and I walked off together in search of the ID office. It was quite a walk, but the wait was very quick, and afterward we hit the bookstore. We navigated around for about 45 minutes, and grabbed all the books I need. The damage? Almost $400.
Then we walked back to the dorms where we separated. At 5 I went to the bathroom, and then started to make my way down to dinner. Down the hall I went, and Jessica’s door was open. She said that she was also hungry, and that as soon as she printed out a replacement ID she’d join me. So I waited for her, and we walked down together. She seems to know quite a few people, but I’m sure in time I will, too.
At the dining hall she explained everything to me, and we sat down with some of her friends, Raul and Steve, who are in our ward. Raul is from Vegas, and Steve is from Minnesota. Jessica is from Provo.
Jessica also told me that she plays the piano, and how she said that she’d accept any calling besides that of playing the piano, but somehow she ended up being called to be the ward pianist. I only hope that it doesn’t happen to me.
Jessica also lent me an Ethernet cable until my mom sends me mine. Thank Heavens!
So that first Sunday in January I put on these heels and walked out into the hallway when I heard some of the girls leaving to go off to church. I felt so alone. Marie was still out of town, my roommate hadn't showed up yet and the hallways and campus were empty. It was so hard for me to ask those girls to take me to church with them. I was so scared and so nervous. Here's what I said about that first Sunday:
January 8, 2008 10:45 pm
On Sunday I also went to church for the first time, in heels. And it was a long walk. Not to mention my being in heels. I don’t think I’ll be doing that again. Maybe I’ll wear flats, with a pair of heels in my purse, and then change once I get there, but I’m never going to walk up that hill again in heels. EVER! There were also some strange folks that bore their testimonies, like the girl who found Jesus in a Coldplay song. Or the girl that went up and said the word “crap”. Or Amy from down the hall who went on and on forever about who she is, and I don’t think she bore her testimony at all. But all in all, it was quite entertaining. Quite.
I had such a hard time keeping up with those girls on the Helaman Hill. I was in heels, it was cold out and I was out of shape. On the way home I had no one to walk with, and I didn't want to be the tag along. So I walked alone. Part way home (I had church in the JKB, the closest building possible) I decided I just couldn't take it anymore. So I took the shoes off and walked back to 3219 Taylor Hall barefoot and alone.
That was how I felt a great deal of the time that first semester. I had Marie. Sometimes I had Christina, sometimes Esther, and sometimes these two inappropriate girls from down the hall, MJ and Carley. I remember a specific time part way through the semester when I walked down the hill alone again and had a panic attack wondering why in the world I was there at BYU, away from home, family and friends. The biggest blessing and answer to prayer that I received up until that time came when I was accepted to be a CA, and I met Rochelle, Boyd and Hayley, along with a handful of other awesome friends.
I've come a very long way from that first Sunday. To contrast it, this Sunday I will be walking (probably in heels) a very short block and a half from my apartment with Marie and MegN, two of the people that I tell everything to. And we'll laugh about something weird Heather has done recently or talk about how we're way too tired for 8:30am church. And all will be right.
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