Friday

I'm really excited that this semester Thursday night can be my Friday night because I have absolutely no commitments for Fridays. And all week I looked forward to Friday. I could sleep in. I had nothing to get up for. And I was excited because I was expecting to have lunch with Blake. I looked forward to it all week. We ended up meeting at J Dawgs. At one point Blake made the comment that it seemed like kind of a man's place, and that was when I realized that I was literally in a restaurant filled with men. There were at least a dozen men, me, a female worker and one other girl. I guess my science classes have made this a common enough occurrence that I don't even notice the lack of women around me anymore.

After lunch we retreated to my apartment. I don't even know what we talked about. Dating. The new semester. Fears and insecurities. Good things. Around 3pm Skyler got out of class and joined us. We all sat on the same couch talking about anything and everything. An hour later Marie came in and Blake muttered that he was grateful that it wasn't my other roommate and Skyler commented that Marie was one of his favorite people. The four of us sat around and laughed and continued talking about anything and everything. I started getting really hungry as it was dinner time, and then Blake left and Skyler and I went to Guru's for dinner.

I love Guru's. I love the Marco Polo bowl. It is seriously delicious. And I love the atmosphere. And I love that it is almost never really busy. And I like that the ice will stay in one spot as you drink the water so that eventually there's a frozen ring of ice with a hole in it for the straw and the water is a couple of inches below it. It makes me happy. I think about Guru's and it reminds me of all the times I've been there. My first time was on a date with James (who, by the way, is engaged). I then went with Rochelle for lunch one day. And I went for dessert there with Marie one night to watch a Funn-E comedy show. MegP and Erynn took me there the night that I found out that I didn't get the student coordinator job. I went on a date with Blake there one night. And then with David for New Year's Eve. And then I took Skyler last night. I love going to Guru's, and I love introducing other people to it.

After Guru's we went to the dollar theater. The next movies started in two hours so instead we went to Buy Low for some oatmeal and went back to my place to bake banana cookies. For the record, I drove us home. Skyler said that he would give my driving skills a B. I happily accepted it. When we got to my place Marie was in our room hiding because Heather had had dinner group over at our place. The result was that Marie stayed in our room all night and Heather went out, leaving Skyler and I to frolic as we wished. We baked. He broke a vase. We sat and chatted on the couch. We lay on the carpet. We pretended to be raptors. I scratched the soft hairs on the back of his head. He tried to teach me how to dance. It's nights like those that I love. I love that I can be whoever I am or want to be in front of Skyler. I can get weird and crazy like I can't in front of most people because it's not socially acceptable. We can talk about anything and everything and we do. Skyler is a special ray of sunshine in my life. And he is sweet and good. And human. Will I ever be as open with the man I marry as I am with Skyler?

I'm thinking a lot about the summer right now. I don't really know what to do. I wonder if they would even hire me again as a CA. I wonder if I would really want to do that again. I wonder if I really want to continue working with housing after the last sucky year. But then I have days like yesterday. The truth is that if you exempt Marie, every one that I am really close to I have been a CA with. Skyler. Blake. MegN. MegP. Annette. Boyd. Hayley. Rochelle. David. All of my really good friends have come as a result of working for housing. If I don't CA again I'm missing out on that opportunity (and the opportunity of nicely filling my bank account). And I'm not very secure with myself and what else I would do. I'm confused and lost. And I'm freaking out because I don't know what I'll be doing in four months, where I will be living in 8 months, how I will do on the MCAT in 8 months, where I will be applying for med school in 10 months and what I will be doing after graduation in a possible 16 months. I am scared. But for now I have 4 months of free Fridays, and that is comforting.