This is my family tree. While it may be hard to tell, my dad is one of five children. All but the youngest (who has never matured) have served in the military. Currently, every one of my grandparents' grandchildren that is over the age of 18 besides me, has enlisted in the military. Half of my dad's step children have been in the military. We are a military family.
It is strange to me when this isn't the case in my friends' families. Last night Megan mentioned that she doesn't think a single member of her family has been in the military. What is strange to me is that somehow in my dad's family the military is more important than education. This may just be because they're not the smartest (they have quite a few learning disabilities). And because of that maybe their way to success was the military.
As I am about to graduate from college my younger brother Jacob is about ready to graduate from Navy boot camp. I have been here at BYU, taking some pretty hard classes like biochem, for four and a half years. Besides my dad paying for half of my fall/winter tuition (and not every semester) I have covered all of my expenses. I have paid for my cell phone, my rent, the rest of my tuition. I have had a job for all but one semester. I pay for my flights home. Jacob, as my mom phrased it, will be spending eight weeks being told where to be and what to do and only having to show up at the appointed time. While it is an overall commitment of the same amount of time I've spent at college, boot camp is much shorter.
The other night my mom mentioned that with two graduations and a visit from a man she's talked to online for the last two years all happening in March and April of this year, she cannot get time off and afford all three events. While she is 90% sure she is making it to my graduation (why it's not 100% when I live four hours away) she has decided not to go to Jacob's. She will quit her job if she doesn't get time off to see that man coming. My dad has been planning coming for graduation for literally two or three years. He is also making sure to go to Jake's graduation, which is great because they haven't had the best relationship these last three years and Jake joining the military really brought them back together. But my dad also mentioned that two of his siblings, two of my cousins, and at least one of my grandparents will all be attending Jake's graduation. I asked if anyone was coming to mine. The answer was no. While he argues it's the distance that makes the difference (North Carolina to Illinois vs. North Carolina to Utah) they're still driving 14 hours to see Jake graduate. And they've all rallied to write to him while he's in boot camp.
I guess that I should be happy for Jacob. This was a big step in his life. And he could use the support, especially if my mom won't be there. It will mean a lot to him. But I'm also really disappointed that during the last four years there has been zero talk of even having the desire to come to my graduation. And while it's just a ceremony, it's the attitude behind it. That my college degree is not as important or valuable. As if I'm more Schnebly than Callahan because I was able to get into college.
No comments:
Post a Comment