Life

Life is good and bad. It's fantastic and magical. And it's also completely ordinary.

Right now, today, life is normal. I go to work in the morning. I look forward every day to laughing with Claire. She makes work fun. And she laughs at me and I don't even have to do anything except smile. And Kyle is Kyle. His office is right to the left of my little desk space and sometimes he stares at me like I'm dumb and other times he stares at me with a look of unbelief because of some weird story I'm telling. Those looks of unbelief make me feel validated. The dumb ones, not so much.

At lunch I study for the MCAT. It's three weeks away. Yes, I'm freaking out. Hopefully I'll take a practice test tomorrow and everything will be okay. But I still have half a bio book and a physics book to go and review on acids and basis, electrochemistry and tons of ochem reactions to commit to memory. I want to have fun but it's a challenge because at the back of my mind literally ALL THE TIME is that I should be studying for the MCAT. What? Isn't it summer?

Tuesdays and Thursdays I get home at 9pm. I, for whatever reason, decided to take a physics lab for summer term, even with the MCAT on the pile. Dumb? Not so sure yet.

The new roommate has not yet moved in. Erin, the girl that is Shelby's friend, has. And as Shelby's mom and 9 year old sister have been visiting for the week Erin has been sleeping in the spare bed in my room. Guess what? I like her. She doesn't seem like she's 19. She's nice. She's interested in my life. She's talkative but does her own thing. And she helps tutor a middle age woman from Brazil in English so she can get her nursing certification. I like her.

Today I got bit by a bug on my way to work. It has swollen up to be about the diameter of a tennis ball, although it is more of an oval than a circle so not quite as big. It is hard and hot. I must be having some sort of allergic reaction because during the afternoon at work I started getting a sore throat and a runny nose. Add that to the MCAT stress pile.

I love Natalie and Sarah. They are such great roommates. They're no Marie, but as she's in Oxnard right now they'll have to do.

Something I was thinking about today: I spend a long time in the bathroom. On the toilet. Not necessarily because I'm using it, either. I once read this article about married people and how sometimes a spouse will use the bathroom for a half hour, and no, they're not actually going for a whole half hour nor are they constipated, but they need their space/alone time and the bathroom is a place they won't be followed. So very true. I never spend a ton of time on purpose in the bathroom when no one else is around. I find myself loitering in the work bathroom so I can take a break from the office. At home I will literally sit there for longer than five minutes after I have finished anything so I don't have to leave the room and be surrounded by so many people. It has become such a long time especially now that Erin is hanging out in my room and it's not my own personal space anymore. Maybe this is an overshare. But it's true. Sometimes I'll be in there for awhile and Marie will ask what I was doing because it was so long. I used to read my scriptures in there. Sometimes I think I should hide a magazine. But until then, I think and I breathe and I relax.